Friday, April 29, 2011

A Report on Blueberries for Sal

I, the editor of this magazine, have just finished reading the timeless epic Blueberries for Sal by Robert McCloskey.  This book is the chronicle of a low-income family foraging for fruits.  Sal and her mother meander to Blueberry Hill (without the aid of a Garmin), buckets in hand, to collect enough blueberries for preserving.  While picking, Sal repeatedly eats the fruit, upping her caloric intake considerably.  To add to this wanton display of bad parenting, Sal's mother doesn't even notice the entrance of a bear and her cub!  The editor is shocked that the mother doesn't take action to protect her child from the sun (there is no mention of the application of sunscreen), let alone the bear.  The editor also notes that the mother could have applied for the government program WIC, which certainly would have provided the essentials needed to feed Sal, thereby eliminating the dangerous trek out into nature.  This blatant omission leads me to conclude that she is probably a fanatic, conservative church-goer.  The editor would also have appreciated a nod to the Endangered Species list, of which the black bear is now a member.  Many black bears live on nature preserves in the Northern part of our country, leading the editor to the unhappy conclusion that Sal and her mother were engaged in the misdemeanor offence of illegal plant life poaching on government property.

It is because of these facts that the editor unfortunately cannot seriously recommend this as appropriate reading for children.  With some editing of the plot, characters, content, and ideology, this book may be freed from conservative indoctrination elements, and thus be made safe for children to read with adult supervision.


  1. Tragic display of irresponsibility! Please urge all potential childrens' authors to think twice before exposing our children to such low morals.

  2. Am I annoying you yet with my overactive urge to comment on all things Hannah?