This title is a goal rather than a statement of fact for us right now! I have good news...my husband's very difficult surgery was successful. It took 7 1/2 hours, and I think it traumatized the surgeon a little as things were much worse than he expected when the surgery really got under way. My poor husband was opened in the abdomen to work on the spine from the front, closed up, flipped over, then opened up from the back to do more repairs from the back. He's got a lot of hardware and cadaver between his three lowest vertebrae, and with God's help, he'll fuse together and not have to go through this again.
Recovery has been what we expected...difficult. Don't get me wrong, Andy's doing amazingly well. I can't comprehend dealing with the pain and difficulty of a surgery like that myself! Now that we're a few weeks past the surgery, things are getting somewhat more back to normal for us, and I'm finding that some of the longer term difficulties are beginning to weigh on us. We're physically and emotionally drained. In fact, the reason I'm posting now is because I'm unable to turn off my mind to the marathon hardships facing us.
After a too-long-abstained-from cry out to the Lord, I feel much better. There's something so sweet about a much needed quiet communion with Him when you're feeling at your weakest. I've been reading Psalms 30-32 tonight and I feel so comforted...I know He understands. Although the severest of the traumas in this journey has been successful, He knows the needs I still have with the more subtle difficulties of discouragement and exhaustion. Psalm 31:7 says "thou hast known my soul in adversities." Isn't it amazing how sweet the fellowship with Him is during the hard times? There is no one who can fully understand what each of us feels but Him. He knows our souls more than we do.
I've been reminded He is there for the long term. I've been reminded how much we as a family have to be thankful for. He has been so good to us, to me. How can I stay discouraged? He is my hiding place.